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20:29: Finland look to win.
Latvia ought to do well, for they have PUPPETS and a puppet master of indeterminate gender.
Norway has clones. Eep!

20:32: Spain's song sucks. BUT they have an Unbelievably Hawtt SKINHEAD Dancer (you know she's a girl cos she's got an ikkle skirt) who picks up singers :D
Malta wins the Perpetuation Of Patriarchal Standards Award. Crikey. Oh yus, and tone-deafness

20:40: THE DEEP SOUTH HAS ENTERED EUROPE! Oh no, it's Germany. Oops.
SMILE BAND, SMILE! Bad dress, but continuing a good trend this year of women with figures!
Anyone else noticed the sudden explosion of people of African descent this year? I didn't realise the Israelis & Arabs had left Israel.

20:46: DENMARK HAS TWISTY MIDGETS!
RUSSIA HAS MULLETS! Push that microphone! Gr! And I don't know who shagged the piano, but it just gave birth :o

20:50: Macedonia has Timberlake-lookielike in braces and sittiebum lady! Woo!
Another Euro trend - dancing in heels. Youch!

20:56: Romania has a singer... who can sing. But not apply eyeshadow :( And ANOTHER ballet dancer who don't dance balletly and wears funky clothes. Off camera.

21:02: Bosnia has ACCORDIANS! And 2 men swapped trousers, judging by how groin-clingingly tight the centre guys is. Youch. But what is this strange not-English they speak?
Lithuania tell us they are the winners. Sure you are. Actually... I want these guys to win. They're cool! *votes for them*

21:09: Britain's singer is 50. And borrowed from Lithuania. At least he got around the inability to sing by just speaking. *does a genuine speechless*
*scowls at Xiphi for insulting Eurovision*
GREECE HAS NO THIGHS! And she hates a guy yet stil loves him. No change there then.
The guy at the front with the big flag needs to mind the eyes of the people around him :/

21:16: FINLAAAAAAAAND!!! Hard Rock Hallelujah!!! *spaffs*
Guitar extensions and rubber FLAPS :D And they put a THROW on the keyboard to make it RAWK!
Wings! Really really really bad wings!
Ukraine has men in dresses with bad teeth. Apparently they're cossacks. And incorporate childhood games into dance routines. Imaginative.

21:25: France has a good singer, but where does good singing stand against HARD RAWK?! Useless.
YOU CAN SEE CROATIA'S KNICKERS! Oooh, and if I yell I sound like a Croatia man.
Stop trying to get us to clap along. Don't you realise we're British?
Tick tock round half past two, you will nibble me. but noone will see, apparently. Gosh.
And there's the obligatory Bucks' Fizz trick.

21:32: Every Song is a Cry for Love, says Ireland. And don't you just need it hun. *shudder* Bless. He hit a high note. There's emotion.
Sweden's entry has the national supply of Vaseline on her teeth. Mercifully she is restrained by her long dress getting stuck at the back of the stage. PHEW! Oh noes! She's escaped! RUN!
Given her "tattoo" & the prevalence of flagdancers, I think the vangies took over this entry.

21:40: Turkey got our dancers, we got their singer. Righto.
Oooooooooooh. Tattoos. Nyom. LOOK AT HER HAIR! HAVE YOU NOTICED?! And a bum.

Armenia obviously called shotgun on kinky bondage. It's a walking talking Cat's Cradle!

Aaaaaaaaand... HERE'S THE VOTE!
Not before the presenters come on with their third AMAZING(TM) costume change!
And the magic b0rked eggtimer!
This Eurovision drinking game? Shot for every amazing. Smashed 10 minutes in with this scriptwriter. BUY AN ARSING THESAURUS!

My vote: (from the top...)
Finland
Lithuania
Latvia
Armenia
Bosnia
Spain (for the skinhead)

VYePmMUuGPNv

Date: 2007-06-21 02:52 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
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